#INDIAN HOT SONG PATCH#

Just donвЂ™t try and shag in time to it because you will literally die. ItвЂ™s not the louchest of tracks, but goddamnit thereвЂ™s lashings of passion in this fast, funked-up masterpiece. But what better way to remember George Michael than shagging yourself вЂ“ and ideally someone else вЂ“ silly while he sasses away in the background? James Brown, вЂGet Up (I Feel Like A) Sex MachineвЂ™

A pop genius, a really cool dude, an inspiration to millions.

#INDIAN HOT SONG PATCH#

Hard to imagine how dangerous and dizzying those jagged power chords must have sounded back then: the first stirrings of punk, more than a decade early, and so hyped-up on teenage hormones it leaves a wet patch on your bed sheets.

This must have sounded un-fucking-believable in 1964. In our track review we said, вЂњNot quite вЂGet Ur Freak OnвЂ™ or вЂBootyliciousвЂ™, but coming up hard along the bend nonethelessвЂќ. ThatвЂ™s more staying power than Serge Gainsbourg! Britney Spears, вЂIвЂ™m A Slave 4 UвЂ™Д«rit went all steamy with this Neptunes-produced track. The production here is crisp as fuck, Kim never sounded more badass and the lyrics are thrillingly rude: вЂњ Tell me whatвЂ™s on your mind when the tongueвЂ™s in the pussy / Is it marriage? / Baby carriage? / Shit no!вЂќ Boyz II Men, вЂIвЂ™ll Make Love To YouвЂ™ДЇourteen weeks at the top of the charts. Lil Kim heard male rappers drooling over womankind in their lyrics and gave them a taste of their own medicine, out-filthing them at every turn. Okay yeah, maybe вЂStacyвЂ™s MomвЂ™ was the sexiest music video of all time. It starts with the mega-toned R&B singer licking his lips and ends with him almost-but-not quite showing his bits. This soulful slow-jam was accompanied by literally the sexiest music video ever made. Come to think of it, that could have been written by my pet hamster Maurice, because that little guy just loves to be fussed over. While weвЂ™re on choice lines, how about some lyrics from this cool 2002 R&B slowjam? вЂњWork the middle / Change positions / Do positionsвЂ¦ Stroke it for me / Stroke it for meвЂќ. Want to hear the most Rihanna lyric ever? вЂњSex with meвЂ™s so amazing / But itвЂ™s all work, no vacation.вЂќ That is the most Rihanna lyric ever, and you and your consequently red-hot sex life are welcome. Either way, itвЂ™s about not spunking yourserlf silly вЂњuntil you want to cumвЂќ. Rumour had it that the BBC blacklisted the song because of its rude lyrics, though this has been disputed. Pretty racy for 1944, eh? Frankie Goes To Hollywood, вЂRelaxвЂ™ One of the worldвЂ™s all-timer great vocalists, jazz legend Billie Holiday here conveys her aching desire to get jiggy with it, begging her lover man to вЂњmake love to meвЂќ. Billie Holiday, вЂLover Man (Oh Where Can You Be?)вЂ™ GainsbourgвЂ™s reply: вЂњвЂThank goodness it wasnвЂ™t, otherwise I hope it would have been a long-playing recordвЂќ. Originally recorded with GainsbourgвЂ™s then-lover Brigitte Bardot, it was later re-recorded with another of his lovers, Jane Birkin, who sounds so hot and flustered that there was a rumour theyвЂ™d actually done the nasty during record. Like вЂLetвЂ™s Get It OnвЂ™, this song has become almost comically sexy after years of being associated with love time.

Serge Gainsbourg and Jane Birkin, вЂJe tвЂ™aimeвЂ¦ moi non plusвЂ™ Ever the canny marketer, Madonna was sure to make the most of its saucy overtones. The lyrics to this shimmering slice of 80s pop are actually super sweet and sensitive, exploring the idea of loving as if itвЂ™s your first time. ItвЂ™s the best way to make your bedroom feel like an all-singing, all-dancing episode of blinging disco-era Netflix musical The Get Down. This banging disco track вЂ“ confusingly вЂ“ manages to be classy (the tinkling piano) and filthy (SummerвЂ™s eyebrow-raising moans) all at the same time. The two is a pair of balls and the one is a foofвЂ¦ I t hink. Look, IвЂ™m no expert вЂ“ IвЂ™m not very good with numbers and got a D in GCSE Maths вЂ“ but it seems that this song might be about shagging someone for the first time. Female masturbation is a bit like Miles KaneвЂ™s solo career: everyone knows it happens but no-one ever talks about it.

Indian hot song